The comments on DT's latest article are gold

"MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s" (mastermario)
10/23/2018 at 12:44 • Filed to: DAVID TRACY

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This man needs an intervention. I’m all for hoarding cars...but who leaves parts just laying in the yard and open engine blocks uncovered?

DISCUSSION (30)

E90M3 > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 12:52

Wait, so the same man that drives shitboxes on the interstate at 35 MPH has problems?

Party-vi > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 12:54

My sisters boyfriend (what an odd sentence to type since she’s in her 30s) has transmission, heads, and rearends laying on his porch. There’s more shit inside, and the driveway to the house is littered with 3rd and 4th gen Lincoln Continentals, like, two dozen of them. Shit’s ridiculous and I love it.

Chariotoflove > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 12:55

I think Stef’s is probably the best.

And yes, this is why HOAs are a thing .

Stef Schrader > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 12:56

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I’m trying!

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > Party-vi
10/23/2018 at 12:58

two dozen of them

Holy crap.

I’m not a particularly neat person, but even I keep all my spare parts inside. Just leaving stuff laying in the yard is a bit over the top.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:03

I’ve been saying for a long time that he’s got actual problems.

Party-vi > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:03

The cars are everywhere, but to his credit I think most of the parts are inside. I think.

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/23/2018 at 13:08

I was under the delusion that most of his antics were just for entertainment...this article shoved me to the other side with you now

vondon302 > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:14

A guy that rents his house.

I'll take David Tracy over the guys I got renting the house behind me. Just as messy and loud.

Just Jeepin' > Stef Schrader
10/23/2018 at 13:23

I did my best to talk him out of the Cherokee. Holding a conversation with him about it, I could practically see the angel and devil on his shoulders.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:27

Thing about projects and parts and garbage in general is that they never address themselves; they just keep accumulating.

So Shiney. So Chrome! So Frunky > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:29

Lets not forget he rents. So he is both tempting an eviction (though his landlords seem super chill) and he really couldn’t bring a date home. I mean she’s a special lady if she would ride in anything David would drive but still....

And the tools just left out makes my skin crawl as much as anything in that filthy car article did.

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo
10/23/2018 at 13:30

How inconsiderate

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > So Shiney. So Chrome! So Frunky
10/23/2018 at 13:33

I am really hoping that the creeper and tools left OUTSIDE on the driveway were because he got home and started wrenching...but I really doubt it.

Derpwagon > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:43

He is disgusting .

ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com > vondon302
10/23/2018 at 13:53

The good news is that you often have more leverage over bad neighbors that are renters . Depending on what the zoning and restrictive covenants are for the subdivision, they can give you a lot of ways to make their landlord less comfortable with the situation.

Sometimes involuntary correspondence from a zoning department, a string of citations or incident reports that could potentially form the basis of a nuisance abatement action from the town/city/whatever and/or correspondence threatening lawsuits from other property owners via restrictive covenants can go a long ways toward making a shitty landlo rd start caring about what shitty tenants do on the property.

ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 13:57

I’m amazed that any of that stuff is still there. It must be a REALLY low crime area, because in a populated area in New Mexico the tools and creeper would’ve been gone before the sun went down the day he left them there. Some of those parts would’ve grown legs and found their way to the scrap yard for few bucks quick enough, too.

vondon302 > ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com
10/23/2018 at 14:07

On it. This is the second time around. First time was easier since they had a ton of aggressive unlicensed dogs.

Sampsonite24-Earth's Least Likeliest Hero > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 14:34

yeah, it stopped being funny a few articles ago, and it seems like jalopnik is more than willing to enable this for the views and ad revenue

ranwhenparked > ITA97, now with more Jag @ opposite-lock.com
10/23/2018 at 14:44

When I was renting, I came so close to doing that. The old lady across the street subdivided her house into three illegal apartments - one of them caught fire due to amateurish wiring and was never fully repaired, despite being still occupied - and another was rented to a redneck that always left cigarette butts and fast food trash all over my driveway apron. This was in the middle of a quiet suburban neighborhood, btw.

The problem eventually took care of itself - she died, and her kids evicted the tenants in preparation for selling the property. And I moved away not long after. At the time, the house was still empty and not actively for sale, I assumed because they were still trying to work through what was needed to convert it back to single family and correct the various other problems caused by the shoddy unpermitted r enovation work.

promoted by the color red > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 15:11

Well now I don’t feel so bad for leaving my semi-disabled Volvo parked in front of the house.

WiscoProud > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 15:43

Yeah, that article did a lot to eliminate the fun image of a “shade-tree mechanic”. Dude has a problem. The fact none of that stuff was put away and left out for 5 weeks is insane.

People get their pants in a bunch when you bring up no one wants to be neighbors with someone like this, but as a homeowner, I absolutely would not want to be his neighbor.

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > WiscoProud
10/23/2018 at 16:47

I have no problem with someone having a few project cars in their driveway, but literally just leaving parts, tools, jugs, garbage, etc just laying around outside would bother me as a neighbor . I leave stuff laying around too, but do it within the confines of my garage at least.

WiscoProud > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 17:09

We see eye-to-eye on that. I love a good project car. Leaving actual garbage (impala hood, wrecked parts) in the yard and leaning against the house looks horrendous.

ranwhenparked > WiscoProud
10/23/2018 at 19:01

This is the kind of thing that would be totally fine if you had, like, a large property and you could put all this stuff out of eyesight from the house - like down a hill or behind a screen of trees. But, in a dense neighborhood, its borderline antisocial.

Nom De Plume > Stef Schrader
10/23/2018 at 19:17

But are you putting up a CL ad for ‘free scrap to be hauled away’ trying?

Just imagine the page views a collaborative effort by the Jalopnik family bringing him to a teary realization it’s all gone would produce as observed by a freelance writer close to the fold.

((Bonus content: Reaction video of Halloween prank at Kristen’s with borrowed rusty Jeep parts.) OK, I’d be fine with just this one.)

I’m completely joking about the cruel act against DT in case anyone is so sensitive that it is being taken literally.

Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks > MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s
10/23/2018 at 20:12

I swear to god I’m gonna smack the shit out of Tracy if he fucks up that 360 block. I told him VERY CLEARLY and in GREAT DETAIL exactly how to do take care of all of that shit as cheaply as possible without cutting dangerous corners. I have been telling him very clearly how to prioritize to keep that Golden Eagle from deteriorating further.

And what does he do? He fucking goes and does all the shit that will do severe damage quickly, or just outright irreparable damage. Aside from the true SHITBOXES, they’re all eminently savable cars if he’d STOP TRYING TO PINCH EVERY GODDAMN PENNY and LISTEN TO EXPERTS. He’s such a goddamn cheapskate I keep expecting an article from him on the benefits of used motor oil .

And holy, fucking, shit. His yard. Just... that’s an actual illness. Seriously. Used motor oil is not the easiest thing to get rid of these days, but you can’t even put it somewhere reasonable ? You’re just leaving random parts scattered all over the place including right next to the goddamn trash cans where those parts belong ? (What, you’re gonna rebuild a plastic end tank radiator that’s bent in half?!) Somebody needs to get him some help.

MasterMario - Keeper of the V8s > Spamfeller Loves Nazi Clicks
10/24/2018 at 08:03

It would seriously only take a few hours and a trip to the dump to get most of that mess at least somewhat presentable. There’s so much just junk that needs to go. And yea, I really hope he doesn’t ruin that Golden Eagle or that J10 by neglecting them or pinching pennies.

WiscoProud > ranwhenparked
10/24/2018 at 10:08

I think he passed the border back when he went mudding in his back yard.

Stef Schrader > Just Jeepin'
10/24/2018 at 22:06

The number of projects seems fine. Hell, I wish I had space and money for more dumb cars. The organization of the projects, however..........this needs work.